Star Pick with Kurt Angle

One of the great anti-heros of the 1980's, Kurt Russell’s Snake Plissken (John Carpenter’s Escape From New York) is a quick-thinking cynic; a cool, level-headed former Special Forces military man with a plan. . . and let’s face it, his combination of quick wit and eye patch makes him one bad-ass muthafuka. Quite the opposite, Jack Burton (also played by Russell), with his diction having a John Wayne tinge, is a cocky, brash American, a fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants ‘in his own mind’ leader who lacks the brains, the skills or the know how to be in that all-important position. The main protagonist of John Carpenter’s 1986 fantastical martial arts action/adventure/comedy Big Trouble in Little China, Burton is a truck driver (his big rig named The Pork-Chop Express), spending those long days and even longer nights spouting his unique brand of advice to whoever is listening on their CB – a prime example, “when some wide-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol’ Jack Burton always says at a time like that: ‘Have you paid your dues, Jack?’ ‘Yessir, the check is in the mail’”.

A rich, hypochondriac of a man, John Kidley (Bob Hope), haunted by a Black Widow (a murderous, marry-a-wealthy-husband-a-year type woman, not a spider), Juno Marko (Gale Sondergaard), flees her side, making his way to a beautiful health-resort-centred town called Bad Gaswasser, Switzerland, hoping that the hidden locale, nestled amongst the picturesque Alps, will help him with his supposed condition, and, more importantly, in avoiding the persistent dame – hence the 1939 film’s title, Never Say Die. Now, of course, the quote offered at the opening is spoken by Kidley, and it references his perceived awful luck. And, to be honest, Ms. Marko is quite the woman. . . having ditched her most recent beau (she witnessed him slipping and falling off the Matterhorn from mere inches behind him – wink wink, nudge nudge), Kidley is her next mark, and it does not take her long to track the wealthy gent down once again. Here is a piece of witty dialogue from the film, emphasizing their rather amusing predicament:

In a mere seven year span, three of the most iconic horror spooks of all-time were created: Michael Myers in Halloween (1978), Jason Voorhees in Friday the 13th (1980) and Freddy Krueger in A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984). Each has spawned a nearly inordinate amount of sequels and remakes: not including the original, nine (and soon to be ten), eleven, and eight, respectively. . . with one of those being a crossover – 2003's Freddy vs. Jason. It is somewhat reminiscent of the creative juices that were flowing in the horror craze of the 1930s and 1940s, when original, folkloric, and literary monsters became the stuff of Hollywood legend – think Dracula, The Invisible Man, Frankenstein, The Wolfman. . . and later (in the 50s), the Creature from the Black Lagoon (all of these films also produced a bevy of sequels). With Halloween already having been reviewed this past Halloween and A Nightmare on Elm Street being planned for this upcoming October (a perfect time to celebrate its thirty-fifth anniversary), Friday the 13th is on the chopping block today. Part of the slasher subgenre, it was released in the period’s Golden Age – 1978-1984, following in the wake of John Carpenter’s successful low-budget horror film.

Less of a critique than an observation, movies have clearly become freer in many respects – violence, nudity and profanity can now be littered throughout the narrative. . . yet, the twenty-first century has brought with it a more politically correct outlook, and stories are impeded in this very different respect (unlike films during the Motion Picture Production Code and after – which, for many reasons, were able to be more politically incorrect, for lack of a better term). Case and point, Abbott and Costello’s Pardon My Sarong, directed by Erle C. Kenton (Island of Lost Souls; Who Done It?). The piece of dialogue in question finds the comedic duo discussing marriage –

To Be or Not to Be walks a complicated tightrope – released in 1942, the World War II set comedy, even by today’s standards, could be called politically incorrect. Satirizing the horrible situation over in Europe (specifically Poland), co-adapter and director Ernst Lubitsch knew, like Charlie Chaplin before him (The Great Dictator), that it was vital to be able to laugh in the face of Hitler and the Nazis, both alleviating the tension of audiences back home with humour while also bringing the Axis power down a notch, highlighting their absurdly ridiculous doctrine and beliefs. A play, or should I say plays within a play, the story follows an acting troupe in Poland managed by producer/director Dobosh (Charles Halton). Starring the husband and wife team of Joseph (Jack Benny) and Maria Tura (Carole Lombard), they are currently bringing Shakespeare’s “Hamlet” to life. Preparing for their next play during the day, “Gestapo” is a satire revolving around Hitler and his cronies, comedy coming from the extensive use of “Heil Hitler”, an inquisition of a young child who the Nazis are worried will not talk, and a joke about how “They named a brandy after Napoleon, they made a herring out of Bismarck, and the Fuhrer is going to end up as a piece of cheese!”. Of course, Maria wants to wear a fashionable dress in a concentration camp scene much to the chagrin of Dobosh, though Greenberg (Felix Bressart), the lowly Jewish actor who desperately hopes of playing Shylock one day, suggests, “It’ll get a terrific laugh” – his go-to catch phrase. Other problems arise, with Dobosh equally unimpressed by Bronski’s (Tom Dugan) Hitler, saying, “I don’t know. . . it’s not convincing. To me, he’s just a man with a little mustache”, to which the makeup man replies, “But so is Hitler” – a line that really hits home.