Shane Falco: “I wish I could say something classy and inspirational, but that just wouldn’t be our style. [Pauses] Pain heals. Chicks dig scars. Glory. . . lasts forever.
A film that, upon its initial release, failed to garner much praise (in fact, most critics despised it), or earn more than the budget in which it cost but has since been reappraised by a growing cult of fans who truly appreciate it, The Replacements (2000), directed by Howard Deutch (Pretty in Pink), is a clever sports comedy that feeds off of stereotypes, giving the audience exactly what it wants – a true underdog story.
Loosely based on the 1987 NFL strike, Eddie Martel (Brett Cullen) is the prototypical conceited athlete, the cocky quarterback who is the face of the franchise and the voice of why he and his teammates need more millions. Forcing Washington Sentinels owner Edward O’Neil (Jack Warden – in his last onscreen performance) to fill the void, he woos back a coach he has previously fired, Jimmy McGinty (Gene Hackman), to recruit a new team to finish the season off (they need to win three of their last four games to make the playoffs).
Forming a ragtag team of losers, has-beens, and choke artists, McGinty brings together a group that have since moved on to other professions: crazy cop Danny Bateman (Jon Favreau) and Earl Wilkinson (Michael Jace) – a prisoner who finds himself behind bars for assaulting an officer; Japanese sumo wrestler Jumbo Fumiko (Ace Yonamine) and wiry soccer striker Nigel Gruff (Rhys Ifans); deaf wide receiver Brian Murphy (David Denham) and a speedy shelf stocker with poor hands, Clifford Franklin (Orlando Jones); the team even has a Minister playing for them, Walter Cochran (Troy Winbush); but the centerpiece of the puzzle is Sugar Bowl choke artist Shane Falco (Keanu Reeves) – who now finds himself scraping barnacles off of the bottom of rich peoples’ boats instead of playing quarterback in the NFL.
Dealt a hand that would be impossible to even the most seasoned coaches and athletes, the eclectic gang must build chemistry, learn the extensive play-book, gel, and somehow win three out of four games when none of them have been playing professional sports for the past several years. Plus, it doesn’t help that Martel and his loyal Sentinels will take any opportunity they can to hassle their replacements – especially Falco.
Of course, the whole set-up screams as to where this is all going. . . and, as you can probably guess, it definitely does, yet it is the journey along the way that is so bloody endearing. Each character gets his due – be it a would-have-been star who blew out his knee before ever scoring a single touchdown, or an athlete who has a serious gambling problem, little vignettes within the movie that attach us to these loveable, quirky misfits – their heart, character, loyalty, and camaraderie (this is the beauty of sports and where it can go in its best iterations). Be it offensive guard brothers Jamal and ‘Action’ Jackson (Faizon Love and Michael Taliferro) protecting their quarterback in a most unique way, or Falco watching over his teammates, it is something to see. . . bringing a smile to the face and maybe even a bit of sentimentality to the heart.
Rounded out with a number of entertaining touches, twenty years on, you get the true nostalgia factor while watching John Madden and Pat Summerall (playing themselves) banter, something they were so good at doing, as they watch these outsiders struggle, get lucky, and then flourish over these four games. Then, there is the hiring of new cheerleaders (as they must be on strike as well – this is never very clearly explained), orchestrated by head cheerleader Annabelle Farrell (Brooke Langton) – who becomes the Falco love interest, is highly entertaining, as the only trained dancers she can find are a bunch of strippers (you can just imagine the sight on the sidelines). Lastly, you’ve got the film’s killer soundtrack – songs from Lit, The Rolling Stones (three rockin’ tunes), Gary Glitter, Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, Bachman-Turner Overdrive, The Dandy Warhols, Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels, Donna Summers, The Police, EMF, Queen. . . while Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive” plays an integral role within the story. Intriguingly, this is not the entire soundtrack, so, I think you’d have to agree that, all in all, it is a pretty impressive list.
A film that deftly meshes the sports underdog story and comedy to great effect, The Replacements is still a touchdown of a tale. Smart, cheeky, and definitely a bit touching, even the cutaways to random fans in the stands, ladies trying out for cheerleading positions, or two aging bar hoppers, are measured comedic choices that just feel perfect for the moment. When you pair all of this with its stellar cast, soundtrack, story. . . and, lest we forget, the amazing fan work that makes Keanu’s hair look better here than in maybe any other film, you’ve got a real winner. In other words, it’s got miles and miles of heart. So, please don’t be afraid, or petrified, I know you’ll survive, and maybe even thrive, if you visit (or revisit) this gridiron blast from the past.