If I were to mention that this review is about a suave but deadly secret agent who is a ladies’ man and also wears a white tuxedo, many of you would probably assume that this article is about one of the seven James Bond movies starring Roger Moore. This is not so. Instead, I am transporting you into the weird and wacky cult world of Filipino actor Weng Weng, a.k.a. Agent 00, The Impossible Kid, or Wang; a 2’9″ tall karate and gun expert, a clear spoof of James Bond and the Broccoli produced franchise.
Basically a B piece of exploitation cinema, Weng Weng stars in two Bond spoofs, 1981’s For Y’Ur Height Only and the 1982 flick The Impossible Kid. The first follows Agent 00 as he attempts to stop a drug syndicate and their powerful leader, the rather conspicuously named Mr. Giant (who is unobserved until the final scenes – much like Blofeld in the Bond series). With help from a youthful undercover female agent named Irma (Beth Sandoval), who is on the inside of the crime ring, Weng Weng is able to frustrate their plans time and time again. It is soon realized that the reason for their operation is to fund and use an N-Bomb – which is being created by the kidnapped Doctor Kohler (Mike Cohen). In the finale, Weng Weng invades Hidden Island (after all, it was rather difficult to locate), the secret base of Mr. Giant. Will he be able to foil the villain’s maniacal plans – of course, this is Weng Weng we are talking about here (and there is a sequel).
In The Impossible Kid, Agent 00 is working for Interpol and has to challenge the manipulative evil genius that is Mr. X (Romy Nario) – his mob, consisting of a slew of unskilled baddies, has a Ku Klux Klan-esque vibe. The super-villain, with all of his maniacal power, holds the Philippines for ransom, and thankfully, the handsome sum is paid by two seemingly straight-laced businessmen. Wily Weng Weng, realizing that something fishy is going on, decides to go undercover. . . once again game for anything, including crushing his enemies’ will and power.
There are many things that must be discussed in relation to these two pictures. Firstly, the music in Height is a blatant ripoff of the James Bond theme – with a few varied notes from the song For Your Eyes Only played over top, adding to the underground cheesiness of the flick. In the second movie, Weng Weng actually gets his own kitschy theme song – I can assure you, this one is not sung by the great Shirley Bassey.
The gadgets are also a pathetic form of Bond-like tools. The secret agent is equipped with all of the top gadgets (according to the caliber of the movie), from an anti-poison ring and jet pack, to a quick assembly machine gun (an idea probably nabbed from Scaramanga’s firearm in The Man With the Golden Gun) and remote control bowler hat (Oddjob, anyone?). In The Impossible Kid, he has his powerful mini-motorbike.
As for the dialogue and dubbing, it could not be called superb by any means, but at a certain point, bad dialogue, with all of the easy laughter it brings, can become highly entertaining. Meanwhile, the dubbing stretches from hard-boiled 1940s accents, to bizarre British ones, while other characters receive spaghetti western cadences, all of the flawed fun only adding to the unique enjoyment of the spy picture.
But what really makes these movies work are the unexpectedly good action scenes (both features are directed by proficient Filipino stunt director Eddie Nicart). Surprisingly well filmed, we watch as Weng Weng never turns down the opportunity to give a good shot to the gonads, kick to the head, or some other surprisingly powerful manoeuver. It is amazing to see the diminutive man move – he was actually trained in several disciplines that fall under the umbrella of Martial Arts. No surprise here. . . he is also an expert shot, though, as you might imagine, he can struggle with larger rifles. Some of the best scenes in Height include a humourous attack by Weng Weng at a bakery – the criminals are expertly packing drugs into the baked bread, a fight scene in a disco club, and the wild shoot-em-up finale. In The Impossible Kid, one must catch the opening credits sequence – which finds Weng Weng stopping a Mack truck (then dismantling a group of violent criminals), only to outdo himself later on when challenging a number of karate experts in a gym. Lastly, the final battle (which takes place on a boat) is priceless – with Weng Weng using a suitcase in a most unusual way. It must also be noted that both movies feature villains that have lousy aim (another reminder of how very Bond-like these films are).
What is it that has made Weng Weng a cult hero? Is it his suave style, his masterful way with women, his impish grin, his knowing looks, his creative plans, his ten cent haircut, the way he ‘hops, skips, and jumps’ around bullets (he’s also got the moves at a grooving disco club), the blatant ways in which he is a Mini-Me-Bond-style rip off, or could it be the way one man, who catches the spy in a pool (don’t ask), thinks he is actually a well dressed little boy – in other words, that it is simply exciting to watch someone this small onscreen. . . in any case, there is something magical about this tiny figure – something unquantifiable that emanates from this unexpected and little known Filipino star.
Two movies that may be as cult as you can get, many of you may be shocked to learn that For Y’ur Height Only was a huge success on its release in the Philippines, as well as in other markets such as Iceland and Papua New Guinea – even out-earning The Empire Strikes Back in many third world markets. These films also hold another unusual honour – that of Weng Weng being the shortest adult lead actor according to The Guinness Book of World Records. Sadly, Weng Weng passed away of a heart attack at the age of thirty-four (back in 1992). . . if you are interested in learning more about him, track down the intriguing 2007 documentary The Search for Weng Weng, by Andrew Leavold. So, give these two fringe films a chance – though small in stature, they pack a big punch (and both features can be found on Youtube – which is a bonus).