Of course, it is a good rule of thumb to never fool around with any zombies – after all, they can really make a mess of your pristine clothing – not to mention the whole ‘eating you’ thing. But here is something you perhaps didn’t know. . . the worst zombie of all – the ancient Etruscan. A gonzo, go for broke, grindhouse motion picture out of Italy, 1981’s Burial Ground, directed by Andrea Bianchi (a wildcard, edgy film maker if there ever was one), is not for the faint of heart.
Set in a stunning, if slightly shabby country villa (beautifully shot on location), a group of people have the misfortune of having been invited to celebrate a professor’s exciting new discovery. . . only problem, by the time they all arrive, the scientific mind (Raimondo Barbieri), has already been ripped to shreds by these walking dead Etruscans – you don’t have to worry too much, the prof’s fashion sense wasn’t very good.
Inside the house, three couples question where their host is. There is a doctor, George (Roberto Caporali), and his already once divorced wife, Evelyn (Mariangela Giordano) – who has brought her unusual son Michael (Pietro Barzocchini) with them; artistic photographer Mark (Gianluigi Chirizzi) and his model gal Janet (Karin Well); while I’m not quite sure what James (Simone Mattioli) and Leslie (Antonella Antinori) do, but they’re along for the unexpectedly wild ride. They are fortunate to have a helpful maid, Kathryn (Anna Valente), as well as a knowledgeable butler, Nicholas (Claudio Zucchet), to serve them during their slay. . . I mean stay.
Wasting no time, the zombies come from every which way – an underground cavern, rising from their graves, from off in the distance. . . the only thing clear, this must have been quite the massive burial ground.
Trapped in a giant, decently fortified building, you would think the people inside would be pretty safe, yet recall my opening warning – these are no ordinary zombies. With the ability to think and adapt (though they are still slow and lumbering), they have the mental capacity to find tools to bust open secured doors and windows, can climb stone walls, as well as surround and stalk their prey. One even uses a scythe for a particularly gruesome murder. Intriguingly, the zombies are arguably smarter than their human foes – a number of times our couples enter rooms full of ancient arms and armour, use the weapons to fight off the hoard, then simply abandon their swords as they flee to another room – showing their absolute ineptitude and idiocy. So, who will win this battle of lacking brains versus those who eat them? Maybe the humans will simply run to their cars and take off – they could, but that would be too easy. Could the nearby abbey of monks be a safe haven for our confounded heroes? Perhaps they should summon ancient Roman zombies, the sworn enemies of the Etruscans, to help vanquish their foes (sorry, history major – had to)? Lastly, will any of our protagonists’ Italian high fashion be salvageable for resale at a thrift shop?
A bizarre, meandering, and bloody tale, Burial Ground pushes the envelope in the realm of gory horror and creepy children. With a slow, deliberate pace, these dull bulbs never seem to grasp what is going on. Adding to the suspense, any time one of their own rises again, they seem to think they are absolutely back to normal – to their own detriment. Though it is silly, it is effective at gearing up the tension. As for the former, our one creepy child has a definite Oedipus complex (and not a subtle, subconscious one), Michael is all over his mother. . . always looking to be comforted between her buxom bosom, if not worse (he also has the knack for interrupting his mother and step-father every time they are getting a little romantic). At least actor Barzocchini is actually a twenty-six year old little person – which should ease your minds a bit.
An eccentric entry in the zombie sub-genre, Burial Ground is an Italian oddity from a time where everything coming out of the booted country seemed envelope pushing. Relishing in the excesses, it is definitely not for fans of subtlety. . . the impressive zombie effects push to its bloody, if not wholly realistic, boundaries. So, keep abreast of all the intricacies of the zombie sub-genre and scare yourself silly by feeding on this tense game of nip and tuck, it’s the model of horror indecency.
This film can be watched in Italian with English subtitles or in dubbed English